Vladimir Putin “Healthcare reform: Everyone over 40 years of age, to be shot!”

Barack OBAMA “People are angry, they are frustrated. Maybe we should just let them all die?”

Archive for ‘January, 2009’

Larry King Won’t Press “Button” On Sequel

Larry King Won’t Press “Button” On Sequel

“Larry came in for a makeup test and after eight hours of fruitlessly trying to make Larry look younger, the makeup artist broke down, and left the studio mortified.

MOORE RUNS OUT OF SIZZLE

MOORE RUNS OUT OF SIZZLE

“All you can eat you can eat’, should mean just that” Moore stated.

Sarah Palin: “I never sucked as a hooker…”

Sarah Palin: “I never sucked as a hooker…”

Palin was a great whore.

Rush Limbaugh Writes for The Onion

Rush Limbaugh Writes for The Onion

“Rush has a lot of enemies out there, and many of these people he is too…uh, chicken, I guess, to confront on his show.”

SEAN HANNITY CUMS TUMBLING OUT OF THE CLOSET

SEAN HANNITY CUMS TUMBLING OUT OF THE CLOSET

Hannity: “I’ll be wearing nothing but riding chaps for the next 10 days, I think I’ll be mighty glad by the end of it”

PRESIDENT ELECT BARACK OBAMA TO LEGALIZE “WEED”

PRESIDENT ELECT BARACK OBAMA TO LEGALIZE “WEED”

President Obama is on the verge of offering Heroin to individuals in New York.

BUSH DECLARES: “2009 WILL BE HIS GREATEST YEAR IN OFFICE.”

BUSH DECLARES: “2009 WILL BE HIS GREATEST YEAR IN OFFICE.”

When told that he only has 18 days left in office, President Bush look confused and turned to his advisers, many of whom beat a hasty exit.

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